My sister built a house...

...and I'm so mad. Well, not really. Really I'm very happy for my sister and her husband. What I'm not happy about is this idea she has that everything in her life must be kept secret from the people that care about her. Building a house is a very long, time consuming, expensive event in a person's life...yet she did the whole thing without telling anyone. Not my mom, not my brother, no one. She has this weird thing about privacy, but it's like she wants to cut herself completely off from her family. It's, well, strange.

Now me on the other hand, I'm also trying to buy a house. I haven't really said anything to anyone, but only because we're in the preliminary stages. When it gets to the point that we've got a lender lined up and it's definitely going to happen, of course I will let my family know. I'm not just going to move and then send an e-mail saying, "By the way, we had a house built and we're all moved in." I just don't want to cause a big family freak-out before it's necessary, and there will be a freak-out. I'm twenty years old and unmarried. My sister, on the other hand, is 33 years-old, married, and has a child. Everyone would have been very supportive. But oh well. You can't change folks.

Best Weekend Ever...

We had a wonderful Easter. Originally I was going to write a really long post about the weekend, but instead I'll just say that it was nice. We visited my family and went go-karting, and laser-tagging, and bad-mouthed people in church. The food was good, everyone got along and I realized that if I spent every Easter of the rest of my life doing those things with those people, I'll be mighty happy indeed.

Happy Belated Easter, folks.

I feel sorry for Britney Spears.

Wow. I never in a million years thought I would ever say that. Now, don't get me wrong--she's worth a million bajillion dollars and if she wanted to, would never have to work another day in her life, so I don't feel too sorry for her. I just pity her a little.

Why? Well, because I get the feeling that at 24 years old, she's still really lost inside. She's lived most of her adolescence in the public eye. It's hard enough to live through adolescence with parents, peers and teachers watching you. How hard must it be if you're being watched by the whole world? So yeah...seemingly she's got everything I could ever want: She's rich, she's pretty, people adore her, etc. But I wouldn't trade places with her for all the money and looks in the world.

In my inexpert opinion, and keep in mind I've never met the girl, it was a mistake on Britney's part to marry Kevin Federline. I can almost imagine how she felt at the time. She wanted to prove once and for all that she was an adult. What do adults do? Adults marry. They probably had a wonderful sex life, which most couples do at the beginning, but they didn't take the time to get to know each other enough to really be husband and wife. Marriage is much more than sex; spectacular sex doesn't last forever. Eventually couples lose the wild, passionate sexual spark that may originally bring them together. That's not to say that couples who have been together for years or decades don't have wonderful sex lives. If the relationship has any real foundation, the spark is replaced by something else--something deeper and more fulfilling. I really don't think Britney and Kevin truly and responsibly thought past the passion stage or talked about the things that would someday be more important than sex, such as goals and dreams and life. They just didn't give each other enough time.

Now she's married. Right away, she has a baby. Right after that, they're having marital troubles. Everyone saw it coming. Everyone is filled with laughter and scorn. I'm kind of filled with sadness. I used to be a tremendous Britney-hater but now, although she's still not my favorite person, I've grown up enough to realize that she's just a person, like me, trying to live life the best way she knows how.

I can identify with Britney because for a while, I was struggling to prove my adulthood. I moved in with my boyfriend. I got pregnant, unintentionally. I wanted everything...RIGHT NOW. But somewhere in the midst of all the confusion and difficulty of cohabitating and the heartache of miscarrying, I grew up. I realized that I don't have to rush into getting married (and I shouldn't!!!) and having children to be an adult--because behaving irresponsibly and being foolhardy isn't what adults do. I've become an adult because I've matured. I'm happy. I have dreams and goals...and so does Josh. We have dreams and goals together. I'm not in a rush anymore because I want to do it right, not quickly. And it feels good.

Anyway, I originally started this post with the intention of sharing my opinion of the coverage of Britney as a mom. I've seen publications ridicule her son, who didn't ask to be brought into the world. I've seen publications basically call the woman a bad person and a bad mother (and this was before she made the idiotic mistake of driving with the child in her lap). And now the baby bumped his head, and they're basically calling her a bad mother for that, too. First of all, babies bump there heads. They just do. One head bump isn't enough to call the woman a child abuser. Secondly, he was with his nanny. The woman's sole job is to care for children, and whatever you may think about Britney having a nanny--many wealthy women do, she's no different. I just wish that the media would leave her alone. At this point, she's not promoting, she's not seeking their attention...just let her be. Maybe she can find some time to do a little growing of her own.

I didn't know how right I was...

...when I said that I had some major life changes in the works. The same day of my last post, Dr. Lytle called me...and they let me go. Apparently, they "just didn't have enough work to do to justify paying me to come in." I'm supposed to believe that...when they just hired another front desk person? Anyway, so now I'm minus one job...but still working on campus. That gives me at least two months and possibly all summer to find a new job and today I had a job interview. I had the job interview from Hell, to be exact.

I interviewed at a law office close to Maryville. I was supposed to be there at 1 p.m. I wasn't sure what to wear, and finally decided on all black--but my shirt was sleeveless, which worried me a bit. Still, no pressure. It's a good job--20 or 24 hours a week, $10 an hour, will fit in great with my schedule next semester and over the summer. I wanted it. Badly. And then I was late.

I left Maryville at 12:25 p.m. I thought it was right up the road and it was, but I took a wrong turn. Not being familiar with St. Louis streets (except the ones I use all the time), I didn't know that there's a Ballas Rd. and a New Ballas Rd. and both of them have North and South sections, too. I headed South on Ballas, which somehow actually took me North and I wound up on the other side of the city. I called Information, and the number they gave me was WRONG, so I couldn't even call. Finally, almost in tears, I stopped at an insurance office and the lady was really great. She said she had a daughter around my age and would want someone to help her, so she helped me find the number and printed me out directions.

When I called, Tricia, my interviewer was very understanding. I managed to make it there only a half hour late (pfft...only..) and then I had the interview. It was short, sweet and to the point. Then I had a typing test...she gave me an example of the way they type letters. Then she gave me a sheet with formatting instructions. I followed those instructions to the letter, and the two sheets couldn't have looked more different. I don't know if I did well with it or not, and it took me a whole half hour for something that should have taken ten minutes (I spent lots of time confused). Basically, I don't feel like I put my best foot forward today and I don't like that. I don't think I will get this job, and I wanted it.

And now I get to go to class. Yay for me!

Now that I'm an old lady...

...life is good. Better than good, actually. I'm not going to say too much, but I've got some major life changes in the works.

I had a really good birthday. I went to work and had an ok day. Josh and I took care of some business afterward and then went to dinner at the Olive Garden and to the movies. We say "Stay Alive" which is about a video game that kills you when you play it. It was actually, really, really good. Well, what I saw of it between covering my eyes and being scared like a little bitch.

The day after my birthday we went to the STL Mills Mall. We spent like 4 or 5 hours shopping, and the man didn't even complain. I just felt like this whole weekend was mine. It was nice. Really, really nice.

Today I bought my digital camera, so as soon as I get to play with it...look out for pictures of no real importance. I'm just ecstatic to have it finally...it's been two years in the making. I don't have much of anything smart to say...so...yeah...